Mustard Seed

ok i can't get this song out of my head- for good reason- we sang it every day at National (the youth worker conference i was at in New Orleans last week) but i keep singing it in my head so i'm putting it in my blog... i wish i knew the guitar chords- or how to play guitar- so i could sing it to you. but here it is. and it is from the very simple statement Jesus makes in Matthew Chapter 17 when he heals the boy with the Demon. If you recall the disciples asked why they were unable to drive out the demon? Jesus replied,

"Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain , "move from here to there." and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."

so they talked a lot about how we are all church workers and work in churches so people expect our faith to be strong. We think our faith is strong- strong enough to say to that mountain "MOVE" and in the moment we say that we have the skepticism and doubt of- what if it really moves? how will i explain that?- our faith is strong- but we are like Peter- we have our moments of doubting and even if its just a split second though of doubt- we start to sink. and Jesus pulls us out and walks with us back to the boat. anyways- the song:

Give me faith like a mustard seed,

and i'll keep on growing.

Plant me deep in the ground, ya see,

and i'll keep on hoping

Cover me with a Gentle rain

that comes from your Holy Spirit.

and I'll grow into a tree of love.

not happy/happy post

stealing this from Heather:

Not so happy things:

VBS Preparation-rearranging my set up time for a reunion in our fellowship hall-pancake feed preparation- canopeners in the dishwasher when i need them-cleaning process- toilet not working- not being able to see my sister and niece while they are in NE this time- having to rent a van for the mission trip- not being able to go help at camp this week- vanilla NOT being the flavor of the day at Scooter's-

Happy Things:

VBS kids- coffee shop time in preparation- Mission trip in TWO WEEKS!- fresh smelling clothes- clean house- awesome weather- hot bubble baths- margaritas- movies- coloring- naps- long battery life on my mac- ice cream- coffee-hulu-wedding invitations- facials and manicures- bath salts- my pillow- random text messages- amazing friends- the fact that no matter how unprepared i feel about VBS it ALWAYS works out!- relient K- windows down/music up drives- the sun- the SON- make-up- shaved legs and comfy pants- time- etc....

its been a long hard week but i keep thinking of Relient K's song "Pressing On" keeps me going- no matter where life takes me or what curves it throws (though now my car can handle curves nicely) i know that i am ultimately in his hands and everything will be great! 

There was a certain Professor of Religion named Dr. Christianson, a studious man, who taught at a small college in the western United States. Dr. Christianson taught the required survey course in Christianity at this particular institution. Every student was required to take this course his freshman year, regardless of his or her major.

Although Dr. Christianson tried hard to communicate the essence of the gospel in his class, he found that most of his students looked upon the course as nothing but required drudgery. Despite his best efforts, most students refused to take Christianity seriously.

This year, Dr. Christianson had a special student named Steve. Steve was only a freshman, but was studying with the intent of going onto seminary for the ministry. Steve was popular, well liked, and he was an imposing physical specimen. He was now the starting center on the school football team, and was the best student in the professor's class.

One day, Dr. Christianson asked Steve to stay after class so he could talk with him.

"How many push-ups can you do?"

Steve said, "I do about 200 every night."

"200? That's pretty good, Steve," Dr. Christianson said. "Do you think you could do 300?"

Steve replied, "I don't know.... I've never done 300 at a time."

"Do you think you could?" again asked Dr. Christianson.

"Well, I can try," said Steve.

"Can you do 300 in sets of 10? I have a class project in mind and I need you to do about 300 push-ups in sets of ten for this to work. Can you do it? I need you to tell me if you can do it," said the professor.

Steve said, "Well... I think I can...yeah, I can do it."

Dr. Christianson said, "Good! I need you to do this on Friday. Let me explain what I have in mind."

Friday came and Steve got to class early and sat in the front of the room. When class started, the professor pulled out a big box of donuts. No, these weren't the normal kinds of donuts, they were the extra fancy BIG kind, with cream centers and frosting swirls. Everyone was pretty excited it was Friday, the last class of the day, and they were going to get an early start on the weekend with a party in Dr. Christianson's class.

Dr. Christianson went to the first girl in the first row and asked, "Cynthia, do you want to have one of these donuts?" 

Cynthia said, "Yes."

Dr.. Christianson then turned to Steve and asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so that Cynthia can have a donut?"

"Sure..." Steve jumped down from his desk to do a quick ten. Then Steve again sat in his desk. Dr. Christianson put a donut on Cynthia's desk.

Dr. Christianson then went to Joe, the next person, and asked, "Joe, do you want a donut?" 

Joe said, "Yes." Dr. Christianson asked, "Steve would you do ten push-ups so Joe can have a donut?"

Steve did ten push-ups, Joe got a donut. And so it went, down the first aisle, Steve did ten push-ups for every person before they got their donut.

Walking down the second aisle, Dr. Christianson came to Scott. Scott was on the basketball team, and in as good condition as Steve. He was very popular and never lacking for female companionship.

When the professor asked, "Scott, do you want a donut?"

Scott's reply was, "Well, can I do my own push-ups?"

Dr. Christianson said, "No, Steve has to do them."

Then Scott said, "Well, I don't want one then."

Dr. Christianson shrugged and then turned to Steve and asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Scott can have a donut he doesn't want?"

With perfect obedience Steve started to do ten push-ups.

Scott said, "HEY! I said I didn't want one!"

Dr. Christianson said, "Look! this is my classroom, my desks, and these are my donuts. Just leave it on the desk if you don't want it." And he put a donut on Scott's desk.

Now by this time, Steve had begun to slow down a little. He just stayed on the floor between sets because it took too much effort to be getting up and down. You could start to see a little perspiration coming out around his brow.

Dr. Christianson started down the third row. Now the students were beginning to get a little angry. Dr. Christianson asked Jenny, "Jenny, do you want a donut?"

Sternly, Jenny said, "No."

Then Dr. Christianson asked Steve, "Steve, would you do ten more push-ups so Jenny can have a donut she doesn't want?"

Steve did ten.....Jenny got a donut.

By now, a growing sense of uneasiness filled the room. The students were beginning to say "No" and there were all these uneaten donuts on the desks.

Steve also had to really put forth a lot of extra effort to get these push-ups done for each donut. 
There began to be a small pool of sweat on the floor beneath his face, his arms and brow were beginning to get red because of the physical effort involved.

Dr. Christianson asked Robert, who was the most vocal unbeliever in the class, to watch Steve do each push up to make sure he did the full ten push-ups in a set because he couldn't bear to watch all of Steve's work for all of those uneaten donuts. He sent Robert over to where Steve was so Robert could count the set and watch Steve closely.

Dr. Christianson started down the fourth row. During his class, however, some students from other classes had wandered in and sat down on the steps along the radiators that ran down the sides of the room. When the professor realized this, he did a quick count and saw that now there were 34 students in the room. He started to worry if Steve would be able to make it.

Dr. Christianson went on to the next person and the next and the next. Near the end of that row, Steve was really having a rough time. He was taking a lot more time to complete each set.

Steve asked Dr. Christianson, "Do I have to make my nose touch on each one?"

Dr. Christianson thought for a moment, "Well, they're your push-ups. You are in charge now. You can do them any way that you want." And Dr.. Christianson went on.

A few moments later, Jason, a recent transfer student, came to the room and was about to come in when all the students yelled in one voice, "NO! Don't come in! Stay out!"

Jason didn't know what was going on. Steve picked up his head and said, "No, let him come."

Professor Christianson said, "You realize that if Jason comes in you will have to do ten push-ups for him?"

Steve said, "Yes, let him come in. Give him a donut"

Dr. Christianson said, "Okay, Steve, I'll let you get Jason's out of the way right now. Jason, do you want a donut?"

Jason, new to the room, hardly knew what was going on. "Yes," he said, "give me a donut."

"Steve, will you do ten push-ups so that Jason can have a donut?"

Steve did ten push-ups very slowly and with great effort. Jason, bewildered, was handed a donut and sat down..

Dr. Christianson finished the fourth row, and then started on those visitors seated by the heaters. Steve's arms were now shaking with each push-up in a struggle to lift himself against the force of gravity. By this time, sweat was profusely dropping off of his face, there was no sound except his heavy breathing; there was not a dry eye in the room.

The very last two students in the room were two young women, both cheerleaders, and very popular. Dr. Christianson went to Linda, the second to last, and asked, "Linda, do you want a doughnut?"

Linda said, very sadly, "No, thank you."

Professor Christianson quietly asked, "Steve, would you do ten push-ups so that Linda can have a donut she doesn't want?"

Grunting from the effort, Steve did ten very slow push-ups for Linda.

Then Dr. Christianson turned to the last girl, Susan. "Susan, do you want a donut?"

Susan, with tears flowing down her face, began to cry. "Dr. Christianson, why can't I help him?"

Dr. Christianson, with tears of his own, said, "No, Steve has to do it alone, I have given him this task and he is in charge of seeing that everyone has an opportunity for a donut whether they want it or not. When I decided to have a party this last day of class, I looked at my grade book. Steve here is the only student with a perfect grade. Everyone else has failed a test, skipped class, or offered me inferior work. Steve told me that in football practice, when a player messes up he must do push-ups. I told Steve that none of you could come to my party unless he paid the price by doing your push ups. He and I made a deal for your sakes."

"Steve, would you do ten push-ups so Susan can have a donut?"

As Steve very slowly finished his last push-up, with the understanding that he had accomplished all that was required of him, having done 350 push-ups, his arms buckled beneath him and he fell to the floor.

Dr. Christianson turned to the room and said. "And so it was, that our Savior, Jesus Christ, on the cross, pleaded to the Father, 'into thy hands I commend my spirit.' With the understanding that He had done everything that was required of Him, He yielded up His life. And like some of those in this room, many of us leave the gift on the desk, uneaten."

Two students helped Steve up off the floor and to a seat, physically exhausted, but wearing a thin smile.

"Well done, good and faithful servant," said the professor, adding "Not all sermons are preached in words."

Turning to his class, the professor said, "My wish is that you might understand and fully comprehend all the riches of grace and mercy that have been given to you through the sacrifice of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. He spared not only His Begotten Son, but gave Him up for us all, for the whole Church, now and forever. Whether or not we choose to accept His gift to us, the price has been paid."

"Wouldn't you be foolish and ungrateful to leave it lying on the desk?"

Share this with someone. It's bound to touch their heart and demonstrate Salvation in a very special way.

Note from God- through friends

Yesterday my dear friend Tracie gave me an envelope with my name on the outside.  She said that her friend had given this to her and now she wanted to give it to me and the other girls at lunch yesterday.  It never ceases to amaze me how God times things and events in my life.  but this is something i was willing to open my heart and mind to when i read it.  I was ready to read it and glad that it was shared with me.

Everyone longs to give themselves completely to someone- 

To have a deep soul relationship with another-

To be loved thoroughly and exclusively.  

But God says to a Christian, 

"No, not until you are satisfied, fulfilled and content 

with being loved by me alone-

with giving yourself totally and unreservedly to me-

with having an intensely personal relationship with me alone-

discovering that only in me is your satisfaction to be found- 

will you be capable of the perfect human relationship I

have planned for you. 

YOu just keep watching me, expecting the greatest things- 

keep experiencing the satisfaction that I am. 

Keep listening and learning the things I tell you. 

You just wait. that's all.  

Don't be anxious. Don't worry. 

Don't look around at the things others have gotten or 

that I have given them.  

Don't look at the things you think you want. 

YOu just keep looking off away up to me, or you'll miss 

What I want to show you.

And then, when you are ready, 

I'll surprise you with a love far more wonderful than 

Any would dream of. 

YOu see, until you are ready and until the one I have for you is ready, 

 (I am working even at this moment to have both of you ready at the same time) 

until you are both satisfied exclusively with me, and the 

life i have prepared for you , you won't be able to 

experience the love that exemplifies your relationship with me 

and thus the dearest love.  

And dear one, I want you to have this most wonderful love. 

I want you to see in the flesh a picture of your relationship with me. 

And enjoy maturely and concretely 

the everlasting union of beauty, perfection, and love 

Know that I love you completely. 

I am God. Believe it and be satisfied."

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all of your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your path." Proverbs 3:3

Don't

This song popped into my head the other day- and 

1. i love this musical- points if you can guess which one it is. 

2. read the poem written by my cousin after the song lyrics 

3. mind your own business so people can live their lives without trying to appease the onlookers. 4. can you guess the common theme?

(Female lead)

I know a way to prove what they say is quite untrue. 
Here is the gist, a practical list of "don'ts" for you. 
Don't throw bouquets at me 
Don't please my folks too much 
Don't laugh at my jokes too much 
People will say we're in love! 
Don't sigh and gaze at me 
Your sighs are so like mine 
Your eyes mustn't glow like mine 
People will say we're in love! 
Don't start collecting things 
Give me my rose and my glove. 
Sweetheart they're suspecting things 
People will say we're in love. 

(male lead)

Some people claim that you are to blame as much as I.
Why do y' take the trouble to bake my favorite pie?
Grantin' your wish, I carved our initials on that tree.
Jist keep a slice of all the advice you give so free.
Don't praise my charm too much 
Don't look so vain with me 
Don't stand in the rain with me 
People will say we're in love! 
Don't take my arm too much 
Don't keep your hand in mine 
Your hand feels so grand in mine 
People will say we're in love! 
Don't dance all night with me 
Till the stars fade from above. 
They'll see it's alright with me 
People will say we're in love.

poem by Grace Espiritu 

Just a teenage drama
Going on in both our heads
In comparison to others
It's really not that bad
I wonder what you're thinking
You wonder how my mind works
And eventually we work it out
With our own consciousness
At least that's how it would turn out
If other people would just butt out
Of our business
And Our problems
That drama that 
Without your interferance
Would have been dead by now

so, my dear friends, what is the lesson we are to learn?  

Daniel

So i have a friend who highly recommended reading Daniel, the book of the Bible.  so i did. and yesterday after a very relaxing manicure at SoHo Nails i sat outside of Panera bread, waiting for volleyball to start, and read some of Daniel.  and i found this verse that made me ask- what am i being prideful about and how is God going to humble me.  

"Now I, Nebuchadnezzar, praise and exalt and glorify the King of heaven, because everything he does is right and all his ways are just.  And those who walk in pride he is able to humble."

so this is after Nebbie-K-Nezzar ;)  went through his circles of "oh look at me- wait its all God he's awesome- look at me look at me!" and God basically cast him out to finally come to this conclusion. that God is always right- his ways are always just and he can humble you in an instant if your head gets too big.

sooo... what am i being prideful about?  i keep thinking about the verse in 1. Peter that says "they may see your good deeds and glorify GOD on the day he visits us." Glorify GOD not me. God. 

Planners

My planner is obnoxiously full for the next 6 weeks.  I am very much looking forward to July!  

I feel as if i am coming off a slump- where i basically lack all motivation and feel like running away from everything.  After a few days of lazy lounging with a few loads of laundry here and there- i have become slightly more motivated for summer.  (Though i will still sneer at anyone who asks me if i am "ready for the school year to be over- because then i get a small break." because NO. i am NOT ready. No. i do NOT get a break. i get extra things to do because school isn't in the way ;) ) end rant. 

its been a while but i have a few things to update you on- 

one  sarah, in case you didn't know this already- YOU HAD A BABY!!! and I"M AN AUNT!  (haha i only did that because youre the only one who reads this anyways) 

two Hannah Cate Love is my second Godchild and i love her very much!  She is the most adorable little girl!! *well since i was that age of course ;) 

three as soon as june hits it is:

VBS 

Pancakes

Chicago

Portland 

for me.  The dog will be living with various families at this point in time and will be very happy to accompany them on long walks and lots of kid time.  

I think i will read the book of Daniel this summer 

here is a picture of Hannah!!! (and me) 

picture perfect

this is my tea pot that i LOVE so much.  

thus ends the post on pictures.  

do you ever wonder if people would have better eyesite if we didn't have such small print everywhere?  i mean making people strain to read things... can't be good right?
Michael W. Smith used to have an album called Picture Perfect and i used to rent the tape ALLLL The time from the library.  (ps that was a really random side not that had nothing to do with this post)  

This post is all about me posting pictures.  

office supplies and work

Well here's the deal.  my favorite pen died on Monday- which stinks.  i become very attached to writing utensils and when they finally run out it is the end of something beautiful and i have to find something else to use that feels just as comfortable- smells just as good- and looks just as nice.  

Same thing with my highlighter... I got this highlighter for FREE when i worked at a pharmacy (one of those promotionals for pharmaceuticals).  I have had this highlighter for at least 4 years and i have many things that i really enjoy about this particular highlighter.   First and foremost- it feels great! its the right size not too big and most of the time it covers the entire word top ot bottom in one swift swoop while leaving separation between lines.  secondly, it is a nice calm yellow.  it is not BAM IN YOUR FACE alien green where you could color the back of your sneakers and run at night- cars would have no problem picking up the reflection and would probably flash their brights to get you to turn yours down.  

anyways.. bottom line- four years is a long time for a highlighter- and it is dying... quickly mind you.  and i am devastated.  so this morning i dedicated 15 minutes to pestering my secretary into finding this particular brand, style, and color in the massive book of office supplies!  She even promised to call and ask if the description was accurate.  

moral of the story.  i win.  don't mess with my office supplies.  

PS. i'm also very happily working on invites to an awesome girls night with my HS girls and their prom dresses!  I LOVE PROM DRESSES... this is the HS version of princess parties you see these days where all the little girls dress up like disney princesses.  

long awaited...

oh where to begin. i've been delinquent in my updating and i appologize- especially to you sarah, who just wants to know what's going on in my life!  

its FREEZING outside! its so cold the hairs inside my nose froze before i was half way out the door this morning!  But today is a good day.  

For once i'm actually accomplishing my "to do" list and happy that things are getting done.  what a concept i know ;)  

later today i am going to Omaha for a every other week Bible study lunch with some fellow female DCE's.  we are reading "Messy Spirituality" by Mike Yaconelli and i'm loving it.  because i am constantly feeling like i'm not good enough.  After this fabulous break and refresher i am heading to my SECOND week of Guitar lessons and i'm loving it!  i even practiced 5/7 days from last week!  I feel completely prepared and ready to learn more!  

After guitar i was supposed to head to a basketball game for my St. Paul Bulldogs but that has been postponed til tomorrow evening so instead i have a nice break until the Varsity boy's bball game in arlington.  followed with the evening friends in faith meeting (which is basically the LWML for young women instead of grandma-y retired folk).  Speaking of LWML i was selected out of a group of applicants to be the young woman representative for the NE District North for the National LWML convention in portland oregon!!! (so call me crazy but in my world a 2 day bus trip with the old ladies is definitely out weighed by the FREE TRIP TO PORTLAND!!! 

anyways.  that's pretty much whats going on.  and now that i mentioned the whole portland thing i am reminded that i forgot to send my picture to the lady to write about in the Leaguer which is the women's own little newsletter!  Plenty of congratulations have been handed out by my own church's ladies which has greatly confused some of them men because they think i got engaged and that's why the women are congratulating me.  (alas no ring- but a free trip- i take what i can get) 

til later... or next time... :)